Kelly Lashar, MACE, MACP is a Licensed Professional Counselor (LPC) in Oklahoma (License #10212). In 2016, she founded Restore with her friend, Gina Dixon, and as co-CEO, oversees business operations. Her undergraduate degree is from the University of Oklahoma and she holds a Master of Counseling Psychology degree from Southern Nazarene University and a Master of Christian Education degree from Dallas Theological Seminary. Kelly is a licensed ordained minister in the State of Oklahoma and prior to founding Restore, she was care & discipleship pastor for several years at a local church.

She has worked with couples in church and the clinical setting for over 20 years. She treats marriages in crisis with intense conflict and decreased connection, helping to establish new patterns, find healing and forgiveness, and rekindle intimacy lost over the years. While therapy can help with insight, real change occurs when partners are committed to the process and work needed to build a new relationship. Through the process, you may come to remember that out of all the people in the world, you two found each other and built a home and family together.

She is an EMDR trained clinician treating individuals with trauma and distressing thoughts and experiences. Sometimes she even uses EMDR with couples, which is a unique practice.

Her approach with individuals may help develop insight into internal conflicts, emotions, and defenses developed to adapt and survive experiences, trauma, and relationships. If you are seeking Christian counseling, Kelly can integrate biblical theology with her psychology training.

*Eye Movement Desensitization Reprocessing (EMDR): EMDR is a psychotherapy that enables people to heal from the symptoms and emotional distress that are the result of disturbing life experiences. It is widely assumed that severe emotional pain requires a long time to heal. EMDR therapy shows that the mind can in fact heal from psychological trauma much as the body recovers from physical trauma and the brain’s information processing system can naturally move toward mental health. If the system is blocked or imbalanced by the impact of a disturbing event, the emotional wound festers and can cause intense suffering. Once the block is removed, healing resumes.

For Marriage Therapy, Kelly is primarily trained in and draws from EFT and the Gottman Method.

Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT): Kelly has completed the EFT Externship and Advanced Core Training for couples counseling. Emotionally Focused Therapy is a short-term form of therapy that focuses on adult relationships and attachment/bonding. The therapist and clients look at patterns in the relationship and take steps to create a more secure bond and develop more trust to move the relationship in a healthier, more positive direction. Couples and families in distress can benefit from EFT and learn to improve their relationships. Often, clients are dealing with anger, fear, loss of trust, or sense of betrayal in their relationship. In addition to helping the distressed relationship, EFT can also help reduce individual symptoms of depression or trauma. An EFT therapist observes the dynamics between clients in the therapy setting, ties this behavior to the dynamics in their home lives, and helps direct new conversations and interactions based on more honest feelings. To accomplish this, your therapist will encourage you to look at your current emotional issues and then help you discover feelings and emotions that you may not realize you have. You may discover deeper past feelings and vulnerabilities that are blocked by the more immediate emotions you display in your current relationship. You will learn to express these emotions in a way that will help you connect, rather than disconnect with your partner or family member. You will learn new ways to listen and stay attuned to another’s emotions and discover more productive ways to respond to emotional situations.

Gottman Couples Therapy Method: Kelly has received Level 1 and Level 2 training in The Gottman Method of Relational Therapy. Gottman is an approach to couples therapy that includes a thorough assessment of the couple relationship and integrates research-based interventions. Gottman Method Couples Therapy Couples who enter into Gottman Method Couples Therapy begin with an assessment process that then informs the therapeutic framework and intervention. Therapeutic Interventions are designed to help couples strengthen their relationships in three primary areas: friendship, conflict management, and creation of shared meaning. Couples learn to replace negative conflict patterns with positive interactions and to repair past hurts. Interventions designed to increase closeness and intimacy are used to improve friendship, deepen emotional connection, and create changes which enhances the couples shared goals. The goals are to disarm conflicting verbal communication, increase intimacy, respect, and affection, remove barriers that create a feeling of stagnancy in conflicting situations, and create a heightened sense of empathy and understanding within the context of the relationship.